Media

A Step-by-Step Guide to "Making It" in Journalism

Chuck Ansbacher | Monday 21 March, 2011 14:42

Are you an aspiring journalist searching for credible career advice on the internet? If your answer to that question was yes, and not a prolonged eye-roll followed by an audible pffffffft, then we need to talk. For one thing, you should stop — not stop trying to be a journalist, just stop looking for advice on the internet about it. Why? Because anyone claiming to be an expert, who happens to have the time to write a list of steps on getting ahead in journalism probably hasn’t actually gotten ahead in journalism. If they had, they’d be on the ground in Libya, or too busy filing for deadlines, or too filled with self righteous pride to bother giving their hard earned secrets to success out to a faceless mass of aspiring yet lazy hopefulls.

Case in point comes in the form of a ten-step listicle on the subject of getting ahead in regional journalism by it doesn’t matter who because it isn’t Jeremy Paxman. Advising you to “use the internet” and “get the skills,” the list is incredibly useful. The author claims to have trawled “nearly 200 articles by more than 60 young journalists.” That seems like a lot of journalist-y work! Especially to turn out something that is maybe of use to a ten-year-old.

But hey, you still want to be a journalist, you are still looking for answers, and the fact that you should basically never take advice from anyone on the internet hasn’t sunk in yet… so here are some actual rules to getting ahead in actual journalism:

Be Related to an Editor

You can’t spell newspaper without nepotism. Contacts in journalism are key, and there is no better contact than the one that is bound by blood to advance your career for you. Newspapers may be broke, and broad sheet journalism may be a dying profession, but your relative (the less distant the better) can always find a fun job for you blogging your way round the world if you’re willing to show even the slightest bit of interest.

Come From Money

The life of a journalist can eventually become a relatively comfy one, but its becoming less likely with each passing year. Unpaid or barely paid internships are mandatory, followed by unpaid writing jobs on the internet, which these days are de rigueur. This is how you cut your teeth. There’s no time for a second job to bring in cash, and there’s no more debt to take on since you’re already knee deep in student bills. If you don’t have parents to help you out, your chances of survival are slim to none.

Start Drinking

Consider this the most important rule of them all. Every single journalist is an alcoholic. Every. Single. One. This isn’t a stereotype; it isn’t a secret. It’s a point of pride, and probably the singular reason that nine out of ten journalists became journalists in the first place. If you can’t handle your booze, you’ll get laughed out of the newsroom. This is a very important factor to consider.

Write About the Internet on the Internet

Journalism on a whole isn’t dying, it’s just going through some severe and rapid changes. The possibility for becoming a swashbuckling, news-breaking international correspondent is still there, but less so with each passing tweet. However, there is a topic getting loads of coverage, with new people being hired at an exhausting clip to cover it — the internet. The thing you are using right now. You are probably an internet expert! It doesn’t take much; it certainly doesn’t take school. All it takes is some wifi. You can write about how people offering advice on the internet don’t know what they’re talking about. Source this very article! Get drunk while you do it. Ask a question about something on Facebook. Bam. You just did some journalism. Now just do that until people take you seriously, then slip in some actual news, and before you know it, you’re a credible person on the internet.

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