The Metropolis

Iran Now Says it Won't Do What Everyone Kind Of Wished it Would

Chuck Ansbacher | Monday 14 March, 2011 13:54

Iran, which isn’t the most hated country in the world anymore thanks to Libya, has backed down from their threat to sit the 2012 Games out if the logo isn’t changed — even though they say it still too closely resembles the word “Zion”.

And what do you know, they are kind of right! But also, the logo kind of resembles the number 2012, because that’s kind of the year the Olympics are happening. But yeah, the number 2012 kind of closely resembles the word Zion, because the letter Z kind of resembles the number 2, and the letter I kind of resembles the number 1, and then I see the connection between the O and the 0, and then N is just a Z on its side, so OK, I see where the Iranians were coming from on this one.

But actually it seems like the Olympic logo has functioned as a bit of a rorschach test on Iran, and on people in general. For example, Iranians hate Jews, so they saw a word relating to Jews in the logo. And then grrrrrrrrr. They got mad about it.

I, on the other hand, hate guys with trendy haircuts who give their friends blowjobs in public… and so like most people that’s what I see. And now I’m fuming.

It’s really up for grabs here.

All that having been said, the bottom line is that in order to make a threat, you need to threaten to do something people don’t want you to do. This is Threatening: 101. If Iran had taken their protest at all seriously, they would have threatened to, you know, do something terrorist-y. Banish ice cream from the world forever! Or something like that. I’m not trying to do their job for them, I’m just saying. Weak threats like this one don’t seem very Iranian of the Iranians.

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